Reflection # 2: Is “western countries” really safe for LGBTQ+?
Basic information:
I chose option one to talk about my reflection. Besides, I also interviewed two friends who are living in this context, one in Czech and one in Australia, to talk about their views on this issue.
The context: Chinese college students who study abroad in an English-speaking country (or using English as a medium of instruction college) and identify themselves as LGBTQ+.
I will
I found many friends around me have identified as LGBTQ+ or are still exploring their identities and most of them are those who have lived abroad, especially in English-speaking countries, or Western countries. I might be subjective in terms of “if they want to be seen as queer or straight” since we are close friends. I always ask myself, “do I really know them?” Sometimes, I felt sorry to hear that “I don’t know how to tell my parents that I am gay” or “I love my family, but I want to move to XXX since same-sex marriage is legal there.” One of my best friends identified himself as gay, we grew up together and he came out to me when we were in freshman year. I sensed that when we were young, but when the words came out from his mouth, I still needed time to process the information. But why was I shocked? My parents never mentioned LGBTQ+ to me, my teachers never addressed this in the classroom, and I can hardly see related information or TV series through media. I realized that my community, located in southwestern China, the capital city of a province, mainly consisted of heterosexual people, shadowed these issues. However, my “feel sorry” attitude of their identity in the past reflected that I took heterosexual identity for granted. I believe, in China, there is more misunderstanding of the LGBTQ+ group. And in the international students’ community, mostly in the US, Europe, and Australia, there are many of them who identified as LGBTQ+.
In general, I don’t think those Chinese international students are likely advocating for themselves and claim their identities in public or the local community. One reason is that Chinese people tend to be implicit in terms of expressing themselves. Moreover, men are perceived as a short-spoken figure and women should be reserved in terms of speech to be seen as well-behaved in traditional Chinese ideology. This lack of expressing themselves is also related to the Chinese political climate. Many Chinese people are not motivated to participate in politics due to a solid social hierarchy. When it comes to LGBTQ+ issues, which are marginalized in heterosexual society, many people in the LGBTQ+ group chose to be silent. Western countries are perceived as the imagined/ideal community through English learning and daily media. Even though those international students have lived in those countries, they still chose to be reserved in terms of coming out. Another reason is the “real” local community after the international lived for a while. LGBTQ+ issues are addressed in those, for example, gay-marriage legal countries, but is remaining in the marginalized place in most western countries. Besides, many heterosexual people might still have biases or stereotypes on LGBTQ+ group. Therefore, for international, is it a safe place to come out? For example, my interviewee told me that in Czech, where she studies abroad and has experienced xenophobia threats. She thinks local people are conservative in LGBTQ+ issues. But in the Netherlands, people are more open-minded, so some of her LGBTQ+ friends are considering moving to the Netherlands.
The fact is that many Chinese people who identified themselves as LGBTQ+ chose to and tried their best to live abroad. So many people in China may have the knowledge that living abroad is safe for them. Western countries could be safer compared with China where LGBTQ+ issues are not attached importance to. On the other side of the phenomenon, western societies may be easier for them to live their identified lives, which is not married to someone since they are not local and far away from their origin community.
In my opinion, when and why they want to be seen as queer, it highly depends on the community they live in and their original intention to move to this place. If coming out and advocate for themselves are their intentions, it might be natural to address those issues in daily life. But if they just chose to move to somewhere safe or comfortable to live in and they don’t have the willingness to come out, I will leave the space for them to talk or not talk.
In my understanding and observation, LGBTQ+ groups usually move out of China to pursue legal rights of same-sex marriage so they usually choose not to go back. As my interviewee who lives in Australia told me, she is a close friend to a transgender girl (she was a boy sexually before) and a gay boy. They are very explicitly told my interviewee that they choose to live abroad because they can’t live their identified lives in China. They want to try their best to obtain permanent residence in Australia. I think living in such a comparatively safer country reinforced their identity. Though in Australia, the LGBTQ+ group is still in an unequal place, they believe that if the law and policy approach equities one step further, they can benefit from it.
Personally, because I have some LGBTQ+ friends and had some LGBTQ+ students. I self-identified as someone who can empathize with them. However, I can only try my best to empathize and understand but I can never be where they are since I am identified as heterosexual. Then what can I do in my classroom?
What I want to say is that I don’t want to take the social status of my identity for granted, but to respect everyone’s identity. Meanwhile, I am in the position of the teacher, who is supposed to guide, to evoke, to deliver, to coordinate. School is a comparatively safer place in the society for the LGBTQ+ group. What I have in mind for making a more inclusive environment are firstly awareness-raising and publicizing, and then create open space. More importantly, an individual’s endeavor may be limited, but the community could be powerful.
Several practical methods I can come up with and I want to make it happen in my future life and teaching:
– Schools provide opportunities in various forms to address the LGBTQ+ issues, such as club, reflection sessions.
– Schools also can consider diversity as part of the school’s mission.
– Introducing pronoun as an inclusive tool to show respect.
– Teachers include social justice issues in their curriculum.
– Teachers select inclusive materials to address LGBTQ+ issues.
Xinxin, I was interested to hear the stories of your friends abroad and how their “gold standard” of living as an LGBTQ+ person was the western world. I say this because I think of the western world as multicultural with many different attitudes toward and levels of acceptance of the LGBTQ+ community. However, my reflection was on a friend who lives in Switzerland and she feels comfortable with her LGBTQ+ identity there which supports your friends theory about the western world. Probably the biggest tragedy of the lack of acceptance of the LGBTQ+ community in China is that it has resulted in your friends wanting to live in a more accepting society. That is a powerful statement which shows just how important being able to live naturally and as you want to is.
Hi Oliver, thank you for your reply.
Yes, the “gold standard” is like an ideal community that brought to our lives by either learning a foreign language or watching media. And also, in China’s society, we pursue “similarity” instead of (or more than) “difference”, for the LGBTQ+ group, that’s why they seek to live abroad because they need different attitudes.
Xinxin, I think the Chinese and Turkish context are quite similar when it comes to LGBTQ+ community. I know a lot of Turkish friends of mine are moving to the States or to Canada, and they do their best to make sure they can stay in these countries because Turkey is not a safe space for them. Well, our president currently banned kids from drawing rainbows – the rationale behind being it encourages kids to be gay !?!?! – so how could they go back to Turkey?
Hi Deniz,
I was shocked by the Turkish president’s regulation. I agree with you. An open social environment is fundamental to the LGBTQ+ group. Actually, I think the root of why governments are against this issue is different. There are many Gay stories in Chinese history. And there were several dynasties that had a massive gay trend in secular life (sorry, if I phrase this inaccuratly). For the modern China, especially after 1949, the governmetn emphasized the concept of “heterosexual family” because they need to develop economy and sustain a “traditional-family-based” social structure to maintani the stability. I guess that’s why LGBTQ+ group is oppressed in China.
Xinxin,
Thank you for your insight and reflection around this subject. You mentioned that there is more misunderstanding of the LGBTQ+ community in China, and as this is the case, I think this can still be factual for communities across the globe, even in some communities within the United States. Many times, individuals who identify with being part of the LGBTQ+ community find themselves being forced into a new community or pursuing a new life somewhere else in order to have more safety and security. I think it is important to know our students and the struggles they may face if they are willing to share, in order for us to provide and adapt our curriculum to accommodate each student. Moving to a new country or seeking political asylum in any country is not an easy task, and it is unfortunate that many individuals have to seek asylum in order to prevent discrimination, violence, hate and persecution. We all share this one world.
Hi Josh,
Thank you for your comments. Yes, I agree with you on that as teachers we need to know their needs first then accommodate each student in our classroom. Just like our first reading from Freire, I guess love and caring is such an important thing to have as a teacher.
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